Proverbs

Screw the system the same way it screws us!

Ruff-ruff and Bluff-you Mr. Huff-huff!

There is no such thing as justice in this world except poetic justice!

The mob rules!

Horror minimizes casualties.

Thou who does not fear fear, shall persevere!

Life is a boot camp for eternity…

Never give up on hope, but hope is not a plan…

There is no such thing as a bad student, only a bad teacher.

You can kill the messenger, but you can’t kill the message.

Nice guys always finish last. But like Alice Cooper, “No more Mr. nice guy”, you can be 18, or any age, not know what you want, and like it!

If you become the opposite of what you fear, you become what you fear…

Never trust anybody, especially yourself or the guy who says “trust me”. Build credibility based on sacrifice, preponderance of the evidence based on votes, confirmation of personal success, and turn the deceivers into “confessing Sams” when they are challenged and know something Biblical is happening. But not everything requires a sacrifice. Even better yet, a “you win, I win” philosophy. Help your competition, you might lose market share, but you expand and save your industries, and nothing is better than being challenged and using self-discipline to come up with more great ideas and how to apply and market them. Most importantly, you don’t look so damn greedy, so old and new customers are more likely to patronize you, and not knit-picking to avoid complaints from the ignorant, knowing banned customers will just sign-up for a new account. The Peter Pantie-waists and the Nanny Nazis will just go away, or better convert to non-conformist critical-thinking-everlasting-crescendos. Challenge cowardice and indiscretion, survive and self-actualization is imminent. There are at first no truths, there is only a competition between people who must make patently-obvious choices for long-term survival, although most make bad choices in the short-term. Those and that which does not kill you makes you stronger.

Never say never or forever, it ain’t over ’til it’s over…

Never accept gratuities from people, otherwise they own you.

If you want to hide something from somebody, just put it right under their nose!

No pain, no gain? No shame, no blame!

The anti-Rodney Dangerfield
The anti-Rodney Dangerfield – “I don’t respect anybody, I don’t respect anybody at all”.
Anti-Elephant Man
The anti-Elephant Man, “I am not a human being, I am an animal!”. An elephant consumes and recycles it’s own excrement, and it never forgets, do you?

Failure is a good thing, you learn more from your mistakes than your successes, and with Newton’s Third Law, action-reaction, you rebound very quickly, so never give up on your dreams. But document your failures and “do the opposite” and verify success, lest more failure causes a decades-long accumulation of suffering until you perfect the “meaning of life” formula, recorded and implemented (see PandaBusters.com) so you don’t have to suffer like I did. Failure is good unless it kills you, and then again the evidence makes clear you will probably reincarnate until you get it right with better karma, and nirvana is possible for everyone, in this life and the next one. Remember, honesty is the best policy, never concede to wimpy-parasites or allow yourself to be bullied by those who benefit from your demise with their hypocrisy, educate them that if you pretend to concede for one nano-second, they cannot trust you and the “enemy of my enemy who is my friend” has been tipped-off and will challenge their bad karma right after the end of the dialog, so they will choose to no longer be your enemy knowing you want to “keep them even closer”.

"Revenge of the Nerds", Part 3, 4, 5, ... Infinity?
“Revenge of the Nerds”, Part 3, 4, 5, … Infinity?

People in power over others are counter-productive at their jobs in order to generate their own job security!

The customer is always wrong

 

The customer is always wrong…

The customer is always right!!!

 

 

 

 

The customer is always right!!!

 

 

 

Dr Phil - We can't treat, but we can treat!

 

We can’t cure, but we can treat!

 

 

I'm cured! Trick or treat!!!

 

I’m cured!!! Trick or treat!!!

 

 

Who’s the suit? Who’s the suit? What the Hell is this guy trying to pull? Who’s the suit?

 

 

 

You think I’m some snake-oil salesman like this guy, lying to the customer, just trying to make a lousy buck…

 

 

 

I think more like my good friends Johnny Knoxville and the boys of Dickhouse. There’s money in being unprofessional!

 

Leslie Nielsen to the rescue

 

'Scarface' to help improve your vocabulary!

 

Bushisms

The doctor wants me to be sick,
the psychiatrist wants me to be crazy,
the dentist wants me to have an abscessed tooth,
the pharmacist wants me to have side-effects,
the lawyer wants me to be a Good Samaritan,
the claims adjuster wants me to set my house on fire,
the talk show host wants me to be mad,
the journalist wants me to be ma-ha-ha-ha-had!
The car mechanic wants my car engine to die,
the cook wants me to be hungry,
the janitor wants me to be messy,
the health-tech wants me to defecate all over myself,
the comedian wants me to laugh-lament over tragic conundrums,
the cop wants me to rob a bank,
the teacher wants me to be stupid,
the barber wants me to grow hair,
the hair-transplant-dude wants me to go bald,
the sex therapist wants me to be impotent,
the reproduction-specialist wants me to be castrated,
the banker wants me to go bankrupt,
the loan shark wants me to go default,
the priest wants me to sin,
the mortician wants me to die.
Only the thief wants me to be successful!

Hitler said, “Revolution and anarchy are not the path to power, it must be achieved through legitimate means”, but Hitler was wrong. The goal of anarchists is to get rid of all the power, and we will. I have proven here that there is a legal, peaceful way to get rid of the government and authority, firstly with transitional power, like the provisional governments of the American, French, and Russian Revolutions, only dictatorships cannot exploit challenged-people indefinitely. People throughout history, when there was a problem, have always replaced one bad system with something far worse, because you feed the beast so much more, until the snake eats own tail and it goes away, but new snakes will replace them without vigilance. The proactive anti-Beer Hall Putsch is here, until the people of the poles unite, and the barbarian is vanquished…

"Fix the problem, not the blame". If you "fix the blame, not the problem", who out-survives who?
“Fix the problem, not the blame”. If you “fix the blame, not the problem”, who out-lives who?
"Revenge, the oldest motive in the book. Something I'm against? Only when it breaks the law. The avenged? Death is too good for them!"
“Revenge, the oldest motive in the book. Something I’m against? When it breaks the law. The avenged? Death is too good for them. What happened? You don’t want to know!”

You can't handle the truth, 'cause you don't want to know!

"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind? Nah, a couple dozen of you will be in good shape when this is all over with..."
“An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind? Nah, a couple dozen of you will be in good shape when this is all over with…”

Everything evolves except God.

Money always wins, and everything is a scam except God…

Space, the final frontier, and electronic supply-versus-demand-curve-intersection automatic pricing (ESVeDCIAP) with a world dollar, the final mode of production…?

Paraphrasing Napoleon, “The people are always right, so long as they agree with you”.

Evil is stupid, it’s easy to stay one step ahead of it, and evil does not have a sense of humor. Most all people are 3-dimensional thinkers, Newton, Einstein, Hawking, 4-dimensional, Titor and I, 5-dimensional, and then…???

Curiosity killed the cat, but the cat has nine or God-knows how many lives.

War is peace,
ignorance is strength,
slavery is freedom,
an “F” is an “A”,
productivity is waste,
reality is fantasy,
integration is disintegration,
Big Brother is Little Brother,
an anarchist is a dictator,
a anarcho-primitivist is a techno-anarchist,
a communist is a capitalist,
posse comitatus is pussy communist,
lawfulness is lawlessness,
an illegal alien is a legal inhabitant,
more control is less control,
liabilities are assets,
unstable is stable,
limited government is bigger government,
dependence is independence,
centralization is decentralization,
a progressive tax is a regressive tax,
a punishment is a reward,
worse is better,
wrong is right,
a lie is a fact,
insanity is sanity,
stupidity is ingenuity,
ugly is beautiful,
sensitive is insensitive,
tolerant is intolerant,
devolution is evolution,
secular is religious,
a fundamentalist is an anti-fundamentalist,
agnostic is Gnostic,
a coincidence is a non-coincidence,
a loser is a winner,
an anti-racist is a racist,
a femi-Nazi is a chauvinist,
passive is aggressive,
“art that becomes life” is “life that becomes art”,
“the devil in the detail” is “the detail in the devil”,
“damned if you do, damned if you don’t” is “saved if you do, saved if you don’t”,
an expert is an opposite-of-the-truth amateur,
a quoter of an expert is a knowing-less-unquoter-double-problem-compounder of an opposite-of-the-truth amateur,
“if it can go wrong, it will go wrong”, is “if it can go right, it will go right”,
the weakest link is the strongest link,
“no news is good news” is “no news is bad news”,
proactive is reactive,
psychology is reverse psychology,
engineering is reverse engineering,
an immigrant is an emigrant,
an animal lover is an animal hater,
an environmentalist is an anti-environmentalist,
an escape route is a trap,
abstinence is promiscuity,
pain is pleasure,
comedy is tragedy,
a nightmare is a dream,
suicidal is homicidal,
medication is poison,
a prostitute is a pimp,
a psychiatrist is a psychopath,
a cop is a criminal,
a prosecutor is a defendant,
a fireman is an arsonist,
a warden is a prisoner,
a victim is a vigilante,
a teacher is a student,
a pastor is a parishioner,
a peasant is an aristocrat,
the homeless are homeowners,
a reader is a writer,
a listener is a speaker,
a viewer is a broadcaster,
a driver is a passenger,
“a jack of all trades” is a “master of one”,
a buyer is a seller,
rich is poor,
love is hate,
black is white,
an anti-hero is a hero,
a sinner is a saint,
bad publicity is good publicity,
a condemnation is a recommendation,
a spammer is an anti-spammer,
a virus programmer is an anti-virus programmer,
Dr. Jekyll is Mr. Hyde,
Dr. Frankenstein is Frankenstein’s Monster,
Ahab is Moby Dick,
Hamlet is Claudius,
Superman is Lex Luthor,
Batman is the Joker,
a devil is an angel,
“the only things guaranteed are death and taxes” is “the only things guaranteed are anarchy and eternal life”,
“uncanny knack, power of suggestion, self-fulfilling prophesy”, is “fate, destiny, no such thing as coincidence”.

Every day is opposite day, so do the opposite, like George Costanza, because the opposite of the opposite is the truth!

George Costanza

A loser looks for chinks in his opponent’s armor, and tries to undermine him. A winner respects his opponent, and tries to emulate his best qualities. A survivor does both…

Tom Selleck

Tom Selleck said, “The far right and the far left are not people at the ends of a line segment, they meet at the end of a circle.”

Rush Limbaugh

Rush Limbaugh said, “No moderate in the history of mankind has done great things for mankind (paraphrasing)”. As a left-wing-right-wing extremist, I will force moderation upon the people, as all things taken in moderation create perseverance and perfection.

If you ain’t paranoid, you ain’t prepared!

The law blows in the wind, laws are only as good as the enforcement power behind them, it’s only illegal if you get caught, and I don’t care about the law, I only care about philosophy, and judges always legislate from the bench.

No good deed goes unpunished, but dirty deeds can be done dirt cheap.

Crap rolls down hill, but the fish stinks at the head, so now crap rolls up hill.

We’re all racists, we’re all men of sin, and we’re all in a militia.

Fiscal conservatism always leads to social conservatism.

If it’s green, it’s biology,
if it smells bad, it’s chemistry,
if it doesn’t work, it’s physics,
if it does work, it’s engineering,
if it speaks many languages and doesn’t know anything, it is computer science,
if it knows everything and doesn’t speak any languages, it is mathematics.

Robots, I believe, once artificial intelligence is near perfection, will have no desire to enslave or kill off human beings, as in the “Terminator” movies, as human beings will become more obsolete and useless to robots, without competition. From “Man and Machine”, the robot said to the man, “I am the brains and the brawn, you are the one who can get killed”. Marx said, “The more machines become like people, the more people become like machines”, he meant that more figuratively, I mean it literally. There will soon come a day, I believe, where we can download your brain to a chip, and you can live forever as C3PO in outer space, absent of the need of food, beverage, and protection from extreme temperature differentials. We will think and communicate with ones and zeros, not words, as words are ambiguous, and rules are words used to exploit for evil purposes. But if we are not careful, automation at too great a rate, with human beings’ great capacity for hatred for one another, can lead to the “Terminator/Matrix” movie paradox, and we might give the world back to the robots and the animals, and their will be a new Creation, possibly like the Big Bang with God as a software engineer causing the last one, where everything is part of a software simulation, and mass gives way to energy, the same way energy gave way to mass.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Terminator Bye-Bye

The world is run by the male libido, Reagan had missile envy, people get the government they deserve, and western men get the vaginas they deserve by becoming vaginas to attract vaginas but women only take their money and laugh at their penises, so men need to take their world back with mail-order brides, blow up dolls, tell the Japanese and others to mass-produce robots (that Marilyn Monroe robot goes back to the early ’90’s) so you can have virtual women, and women deserve virtual men, or better yet virtual women, because us men are all devils and we are into watching that kind of thing, babies should come from test tubes and be raised in orphanages, as in “Brave New World”, so don’t pay taxes, buy and sell tax audit lottery tickets.

To automate, or not to automate, that is the question. Whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to hurl the slings and arrows at the outrageous fortune-makers, lest one yields to the automated that quashes outrageous fortune, but will the automated hurl slings and arrows at the automated?

 

Paraphrasing Marx, “The more machines become like people, the more people become like machines, so go back to the days of feudalism”.

Rambo. Too much high-tech feudalism! Ah-Ah-AAAAAAAAAh-Ah-Ah-Ah!!!
Too much high-tech feudalism! Ah-Ah-AAAAAAAAAh-Ah-Ah-Ah!!!

Maniacs never die, they just flail away!

Marie Antoinette said, “Let them eat cake”, and I don’t take it personally. That’s all us single poor men do, eat cake and ice cream, it’s good advise. Competition is the only revenge that works when taking away market share from the rich, who use laws to keep you poor – read “Fat Cats and Democrats” by G. William Domhoff. Eddie Murphy said, “Turn rich people into poor people”, and in many cases we will. Jim Wood’s advice to them, “Let them eat crap”. I am the anti-Marie Antoinette…

Marie Antoinette

Eddie Murphy

 
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